Archive for August, 2021

The Funny Side to Dating – 3 Sections to Amuse and Entertain You

August 25th, 2021

I know that dating can be serious business, but I think that many of you could do with a bit of a break from all the drama and have a bit of a giggle. I trust that this article will help to point out that there is a humorous side to dating.

We all need to learn to see the funny side of things and have a laugh once and a while, even if it is at someone else’s expense.

*WARNING: Do not try any of these at home!

Online Dating Funnies:

If you have ever joined an online dating site you will probably know that they often ask you to write a catchy profile header about yourself to entice more people to read your profile. Well this has always annoyed me as I can never think of anything witty or profound to say and even though I personally think I am brilliant, I cannot always get this message across to other people.

I have done some research and found a few people who obviously do know how to attract someone’s attention, even if it is not in the most conventional way.

9 of the Funniest Online Dating Profile Headers

1. You must be over 5’10″ to read my profile
2. Is this thing like eBay?
3. Shopping for Guys – And They Said There Was No Such Store
4. I bathe everyday!
5. Feel free to interact with me. All my shots are current!
6. Coffee, Chocolate and Men – some things are just better rich.
7. I believe in dragons, good men, and other fantasy creatures.
8. You can’t ALL be the one I am looking for!
9. Willing to lie about how we met!

Would you be enticed to message one of those people? I know I probably would. A good sense of humour is a very attractive quality

Meeting the Parents:

Meeting the parents can be a very nerve wracking experience as I very well know. Upon meeting my fiancés parents almost 3 years ago now, I vaguely remember telling his mother in my drunken state that I would shag Will Smith if it came down to it. Seriously!?! What on earth was I thinking? Needless to say, I am not the only one who has messed up and so to help you I have researched a list of 10 things you definitely should not say when meeting the parents for the first time (make that 11 if you include the Will Smith incident).

9 Things You Should Never Say When Meeting the Parents

1. “Shall we get take-out instead?”
2. “Is that your car in the driveway that I just backed into?”
3. “This house could really do with a lick of paint”
4. “I am glad I ate before coming over”
5. (To the mother) “You are as sexy as your daughter.”
6. (To the father) “That shelf looks crooked; did you put it up yourself?”
7. (If they smoke) “Did you know that smoking causes cancer?”
8. “Do you want me to cook”
9. “Can I sleep in (girlfriend/boyfriend)’s room tonight?”

Pick Up Lines:

I am sure we have all had pick up lines used on us at some point or you have used them yourself. I know I have had some of them tried on me and I mostly just laugh them off, but the really funny ones sometimes get my attention.

Some of these can be a bit rude, so read them with caution.

7 of the Wost, but Somewhat Amusing Pick Up Lines

1. I bet you $40.00 that you are going turn me down.
2. You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Well not in my case!
3. You know what? Your eyes are the same colour as my Porsche (we all know why that one could work)
4. You might as well sleep with me because I am going to tell everyone we did anyway.
5. I would say God bless you, but it looks like he already did.
6 You look like my second wife! And I’ve only been married once.
7. I’m invisible. (Really?) Can you see me? (Yes) How about tomorrow night?

I hope these gave you as much of a chuckle as they gave me. I would not recommend you try any of the above, but if you do I wish you luck and kindly request that you do not come running to me if they fail.